Yeah, Jess lives. if you can call it that, that is.

One more week then I'll probably shine a li'll light on what's been up and down and around in the past three months. I can safely say that a lot's been up and down. I'm still struggling with the main issue in my life right now, but to be honest, i think i'll always struggle getting over that completely, i never will in entirety, but then i can't go around doing insane things such as holding down a full time job and studying full time to keep that "issue" out of my mind either. Sooner or later it catches up with me and brings me down in odd ways and tears me up to pieces. (Guess who found THAT out the hard way!) Thank God for my boss, great guy. So many parallels with Alex too...and considering how i feel about coincidences...yeah. 

More on that and more next week.

Ahem...


like a li'll 2 year old kid eh? "yay i can use Photoshop and do simple stuff"

OKay it's no masterpiece, but:

Yay my MacBook's here! I spent the last couple of hours toying with it, setting stuff up and trying to get used to things. I do like it thus far, even if it takes a bit to get used to, and I still use all the Windows shortcuts and all, bad habit.

Still have to dig up word for Mac, Open Office maybe, unless there's something better out there. Also a GAIM like program to use for chatting. I found something called 'Fire' can't figure out how to go into an IRC channel, it connects find, but no clue where to set it so it enters a channel , installed a bunch of other things there, just in case. Added music as well, about four days worth of it on iTunes.

Mmmm must go on a software hunt tomorrow after class.. not to mention buy an External Hard Disk...and a laptop case.

Merry Christmas to all.

I hope you got what you wanted and your wishes came true or will come true as the New Year approcahes and beyond. And hope most of you spent time well with family and friends. Best wishes for New Year.

I need to get a "This Journal is Friends Only" banner, because this LJ has been FO for awhile now.

Something NCIS - themed for starters, 'haps.

Comment if you want to be added as a friend so you can read my daily entries.

You scored as Serenity (Firefly). You like to live your own way and don�t enjoy when anyone but a friend tries to tell you should do different. Now if only the Reavers would quit trying to skin you. Babylon 5 (Babylon 5) 100% Serenity (Firefly) 100% FBI's X-Files Division (The X-Files) 88% Moya (Farscape) 88% Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix) 81% Bebop (Cowboy Bebop) 75% SG-1 (Stargate) 75% Deep Space Nine (Star Trek) 75% Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica) 69% Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda) 63% Millennium Falcon (Star Wars) 63% Enterprise D (Star Trek) 56% Your Ultimate Sci-Fi Profile II: which sci-fi crew would you best fit in? (pics) created with QuizFarm.com

Wootcha! Yep. I'm on the right simm in FE ^^ Hehe

Thank you for the reminder of our old plans to get Falco and Jackie drunk, there Cath.... Plan A or B. Yes.. worst ending to stage 3 possible. whether we go with Plan A or B, but could be fun either way^^  although not as freaky if we'd have gone ahead with it back then.

And yes.. have fun arguying with Jackie... she's got that "I got an idea but I ain't telling you what it is!"  O.o whatever the hell that means...

I can't wait to see how this one plays out for sure. heh.

Killer Kitty is not amused.....

Hehe... nice li'll imprompty RP thing we did there.

Yep they're quite the pair... Hehe

Can't wait till it's JPed and put into action, because I think that'll be a hoot to write and read later on.

didn't get to bed until something like 5 am. and even then I wasn't too sleepy. my mind's been in overdrive with things. writing/plotting mostly.

upgraded the horizon's forums today to 3.6.1.  took awhile, I FUBARed the SQL database because i tried uploading one where I removed the junk char sets so the posts can be read clearly, and apparently i mucked something up there.

I'm still waiting for 'em to release the Darkness skin for 3.6. that was a neat skin, and we had it modded for the Horizon quite nicely too. Need to do something with the 'rizon's website too, but... guh.. just dunno what/how.  Wish I could whip up somethin' shiny, but my talents lie elsewhere.

edit: and guess who set this to private again...? genius, eh?

So no oranges today. Gotta say I'm feelin' twitchy over that. or is it the lack of coffee... not had that in like a week now I think.

I was just gonna do an entry for the Horizon and put Jackie's bio into the InfoBase.

next thing I know:
http://www.bfinfobase.org/index.php?title=Category:Task_Force_58_Member_Simms
http://www.bfinfobase.org/index.php?title=Task_Force_58_Mission_Database
http://www.bfinfobase.org/index.php?title=USS_Horizon
http://www.bfinfobase.org/index.php?title=Jackie_Clawson
http://www.bfinfobase.org/index.php?title=User:Jackie_Clawson

and organized the ships in alphabetical order; we had a whole bunch under Us becuase people put them under USS <whatevername> instead of the <whatevername>, USS.

Yeah I'm sad... heh. was meant to be writing a post for the 'rizon, but isntead spent the time on the InfoBase. D'oh! It's an addictive li'll bugger I say!

Snagged from rjtremor

( My Interests Collage! )

Paul from FE made these for me.

last few are hilarious!

( Banners! )

and an animated one:





Hehe.. :D

Hmm I think I found a CD to write by...'Firefly' and Serenity soundtracks.  yeah the writing is not a whole lot easier, but the mood's sorta there , and kind of helps me come up with words. if only WinAmp didn't crash so much.

but.... as a means to beat my 'block' of sorts, I've taken up a few cameos in my TFs simms. Thus far I'm helping launch the Relentless and the USS Gemini. And nevermind that officially IC, Jackie's in a coma.... Maybe it's just the Horizon I need to take a step back from to 'relax' a bit and get writing again.  Thus far I've maned to write a 3 page 'intro' post of sorts, that's taken me a few days to write, and I'm still not pleased with it, but at least it's done; and it seems to bring Jackie back a bit.  Even if she's 'out of her element' of sorts, by not being on the Horizon. Which might be a good thing.  It doesn't make it much easier to write in terms of getting the character and hearing the character again, but at least this is a good start to things going back on track.

I hope....

Another random meme

You Have Your Sarcastic Moments

While you're not sarcastic at all times, you definitely have a cynical edge. In your opinion, not all people are annoying. Some are dead! And although you do have your genuine moments, you can't help getting your zingers in. Some people might be a little hurt by your sarcasm, but it's more likely they think you're hilarious.

Charming, eh?

Wrong....Not without a gorram lobotomy right now. far too much on my mind. and I've only managed to write down a small bit of it on my note pad. Not that a lot of it makes sense, still.. :/

Random meme thing again...

You Are 32% Control Freak

You have achieved the perfect balance of control and letting go. You tend to roll with whatever life brings, but you never get complacent.

Well at least I'm not a control freak.... heh.

Just confused and insane and....going more insane!!! >.< Meeep!!

Unbelievable!

Given all the construction going on in this country and how they'd like ot be known as a developing country (quickly developing at that) and given how much cash they spend on all this...something like a 5-hour power cut stalls everything easily. BUt then it's that time of the year, when the powergrids overload because people have too much crud plugged in and the power station(s) can't take it. 

Makes you wonder if they want to spend the money wisely and take some action to upgrade the power stations so they can handle things in the ever growing heat. but no, they'd rather build another gorram bridge or steal the latest idea in 'oooh they have a metro, we'll have a bigger metro! and oooh ooh let's all start building it AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!' *headdesk*  or the 'oooh shiny! let's rip off DisneyLand! and call it.... DUBAILAND!' How friggin' original....

thankfully I was outta the house for most of the morning. Me and dad ran a few errands, picking up parts and shopping for food and such.  I was a bit twitchy when we got to the fuel station to refuel and I smelled the gasoline, boy did THAT bring back a few... flashbacks of things. *sideglance* yeah....quite vivid too, thankfully dad didn't notice me being on edge there. I was half expecting someone to catch fire. go figure. O.o not quite sure what to make of it.

and my shoulder's not doing any better :/ neither is my hand. Can't type clearly with the right hand, so i'm typing mostly with the left one. (Gave up depending on typing with the right one when I was talking to FG in the wee hours of the morning and my 'speech' was nothing but typos on top of typos... )O.o  wrist support time mebbe...Dunno what to do about the shoulder aside taking it easy with it. but will I do it? not until it's fallin' off!  still got spare parts that me and dad brought back today to sort out through....

slightly off topic...Big mistake in drinking tea, thought my stomach could handle it, but nope.. now I feel like something run me over, then backed up and did it again.

but.... sometimes Winamp pulls nice surprises....
such as these two:
( Welcome To Wherever You Are )

and

( I Am )

Yeah...Couldn't this thing play these songs *before* ?! No, out of the several thousand songs I have on my playlist it HAD to play the love songs and songs that reminded me of a certain someone? :: glares :: Oy!

Not that I minded the reminders, they're still there, in a lot of other ways. they just didn't help me sort out my feelings when certain songs were playing... like 'Everything I Do (I Do it For You)' , 'When you're Gone' and a whole set of others....

Off to Mall of the Emirates to check out Virgin Megastore to unwind a bit..., maybe max out my credit card (if there's anything worth buying there that is)..

I need something to get my mind off.... things.... maybe this'll help...